Very sadly, my hubby's brother lost his 6 year battle with cancer (multiple myeloma) on Sunday, January 20th.

My hubby & his sister were able to fly out to San Diego on Sun the 13th & spend a couple good days with him before his final trek to Kayser Permanente Hospital late Tues the 15th. 
I know in my heart that Jeff was very grateful for that time with them.  And I can't even tell you how glad I am that they had decided to make the trip out there.
On Wed the 16th Jeff made the decision that he no longer wished to fight.  He was then given oxygen & a continous IV morphine drip & lapsed into a state of unconsiousness until his heart finally gave up & he took his last breath in the afternoon of Sun the 20th.

His parents & other brother & myself had flown out there on Wed the 16th. 

There was a beautiful service for him on Thursday the 24th, with a packed room full of friends & loved ones coming to pay their last respects to a very strong, very good man.  A man who will be very missed, & very fondly remembered by many. 

You know, even when you know that a loved one is terminally ill, you are never ready & completely accepting.  I guess you just hold on with all your might to hope.  You keep thinking that, miraculously, one year will turn into another, then another, then another ... you're never ready for the end. 

Jeff had four good years in remission.  I feel good in knowing that he lived that time to the very fullest.  I think that once he accepted that his time was limited, he became determined to make the very best of the time he had.  And God bless him, he did!

I didn't spend a lot of time with him.  We lived so far apart & I only saw him once or twice a year in the ten years hubby & I have known each other.  But he was the kind of guy who immediately made an impression.   You didn't need to spend a whole lot of time with to feel close to him.  He was so personable, & so real & down to earth that he made me feel like I'd known him forever.  And the endless, heart warming family stories I've heard throughout the years about his childhood touched on some of my own childhood memories.

He made an impact on my life.  On the lives of all who were fortunate enough to have known him.

Rest well in peace Jeff, I love you 

It's the second nite without hubby here.  We've just never spent much time apart & I thought it might be kind of liberating, or fun being away for awhile, but so far it's been no party. 

He & his sister flew out to San Diego to visit their brother, who is not doing very well.  I've talked to him many times on the phone today, as he tries to keep me updated, but I just should have gone with him.  Being on this end, many miles away, is driving me nuts! 

Jeff was diagnosed with multiple myeloma about 5 years ago I beleive.  He did have a stem cell transplant at City of Hope near LA & then had about 3 good years in remission before getting sick again this past summer.  He's been in & out of the hospital several times in the past 6 months or so & has under gone more chemo & radiation, but now the Drs say there's nothing more they can do for him except palliative care. 

My hubby & his sister are spending their time sitting with him, helping him get around & even outdoors a little bit to enjoy the beautiful California weather & sunshine.  They're cooking good meals for him & his wife & their 10 year old grandson that lives with them.  They're helping organize his meds & making sure he's taking them. 

And they're looking into some kind of health care for him outside of the hospital.  In home health care, or a visiting nurse type of situation ... anything!  Jeff & his wife are not real open to the idea & have already basically refused hospice care.  He desperately needs something.  Hubby has to return to work next week & his sister has to return home to her hubby & young kids. 

It was such a great relief to me when hubby decided to go down & help his brother.  But I honestly don't know what's going to happen when he returns home.